The Laws of Chemistry
by Maelza
Summary: In order to form new bonds, the old ones must be broken.
1. Sentence

Warnings: Orosaso, Deisaso (or SasoDei, it's currently undecided), short, fluff, angst, suicidal thoughts, a bit of OoCness

* * *

'In order to form new bonds, the old ones must be broken'

My science teacher.

* * *

It all started at that party, it was all that chick's fault. Her fault for insulting me, her fault for raising her fists at me.

I was the only sober one, I was the only person who had a coherent thought left. Oh, why did I let him drag me? Why didn't I say it was a horrible idea? Why didn't I tell him to stay at home? Why didn't I stop him… why?!

--

It's been two weeks since the incident; it's been fourteen fucking days! I tore my hair out, I screamed, I didn't eat. I ate maybe one piece of food a day. I sat in my chair, screaming, crying for fourteen fucking days. I only drank the water after I went to the washroom, returning to my chair shortly after. I looked out the tempered and tinted glass, wanting to see him come home again.

I heard banging on my door, a woman's voice screaming, "Sasori!! Sasori!!" her voice was worried, scared. "SASORI! OPEN UP!" She screamed and I could tell she was crying from a sick worry.

I read the paper today; it's sitting on my lap. It was on the front page, "Orochimaru found guilty of the murder of…" the females name didn't concern me. She was the guilty one.

I couldn't believe it. The tears I thought that had died up were constantly dropping from my eyes, they couldn't stop. The page was almost an entirely smudged, only the title miraculously remaining intact. '_He's gone…,'_ was my only constant thought during the day.

"SASORI!" the woman screamed again, the pounding increasing.

I held a slim metal object in my hands. I felt guilty; I should have stopped him. I should've said no.

--

Flashback

_Orochimaru smiled and held me in his unusually pale arms, "-Sssori-kun… we'll spend eternity together… it'll be your everlasting beauty."_

_I leaned back into his embrace, "yes we will Orochimaru, it'll be pure, and it'll be _art."

Flashback End

--

As the metal lowered, my door burst open and the blue-haired woman slapped the blade away, "dammit Sasori! Stop this! You're destroying yourself!! What happened to your eternity! What happened?! Snap out of this! He wasn't your life! He was a PART of it. Stop it… he'll be out in four years, you can wait until then, you have an eternity. You can wait it out!" She screamed, and her long fingers clenched into a fist.

"What's the point?" I spoke out, my voice dead as I stared at the knife on the floor.

* * *

Yes omg Suicidal!Sasori and some OroSaso Oo;; and No, I'm not a huge fan of it, I accept it and support it only a little bit XD  
Blame my science teacher for this! She put notes up on the board... and I was listening to an emo song and when I read it I'm like... OMG! IDEA! haha So It'll be OroSasoDei I guess you can say XD

I like this fanfiction so far and it'll probably be maybe five parts or so. I feel more comfortable writing one with parts anyway :P

Oh BTW, Sasori is going to be a puppet in this fanfiction, except he's slowly turning himself into one, so technically he can still die by blood loss at this current time XD

Orochimaru, Konan, and Sasori belong to Masashi Kishimoto  
Idea, the murdered chick belong to petite-neko/vatelle


	2. Visiting

Warnings: Orosaso, Deisaso (or SasoDei, it's currently undecided), short, fluff, angst, suicidal thoughts, a bit of OoCness

Orochimaru, Konan, and Sasori belong to Masashi Kishimoto  
Plot, the murdered chick, and the police person belong to me aka petite-neko/vatelle

* * *

'In order to form new bonds, the old ones must be broken.'  
My science teacher.

I watched as the cars, trees and buildings whip past me as I sat in the passenger's seat. I didn't trust myself to driving. Knowing my current status, I probably would have caused an 'accident' on purpose.

"We're here," the taxi driver spoke to me, "it'll be 1500 yen please."

I paid him the money and left the automobile, shutting the door loudly. I looked up at the prison, my mind refusing to accept the details, to accept the facts. I walked through the gates numbly, signing in and being checked for any harmful materials. I told them that I was visiting Orochimaru - his name fell off my lips with a dead tone.

It was then when I realized that I had not only blamed myself and that insolent female, I also blamed him. It struck at my broken heart. I couldn't bear to blame my lover, I couldn't give him the title of 'murderer' or that it was 'his fault'. I believed he was innocent; it was the only thing that kept me going. I couldn't see the flaws within Orochimaru. He was like me wasn't he? He wished for eternity… he desired for pure art. He can't have flaws, he had to be perfect. We were made for each other, we were the perfect couple.

They lead me to a room with a plastic border separating us. I looked anxiously up at the door where he would enter. Thousands of thoughts were running through my head, '_Has he changed? Does he still have his hair? Did they beat him? Is he unhappy? Would he turn around if he saw me? Does he still love me?!_' I refused to let myself cry.

I heard the jingle of keys, and my heart stopped. I haven't seen him in person for what seemed years. I missed him. I wanted him back. I watched the door open, seeing a guard block my lover's face, my lover's body. My eyes glued to the spot where Orochimaru surely stood, restlessly, I couldn't wait. I hated it, I hated waiting.

I didn't know what to expect when the guard moved. I didn't know if he had changed. Orochimaru seemed sense that, he seemed to know. It puzzled me how he knew how I felt. It seemed so... eerie.

I felt another stab to my heart. _'Why am I always thinking of the flaws now? No... There is none. My mind is just creating scenarios and exaggerating ideas... he's perfect, we're perfect. He knows me, he needs to know me so he can help me_,' I reassured myself, but, I just couldn't rid myself of the doubt that still lingered in my heart, my mind. Though, I had no time to think of it; because I didn't notice when I moved my gaze.

I raised my eyes and all of my doubts seemed to disappear, "Orochi-san..." I whispered, smiling weakly.  
"My little scorpling," he hissed in that lovely voice of his; his hair was the same, his eyes still had that out worldly glow to them. The pale skin that he wore looked so smooth; it still looked white yet never placid. But, they put him in that horrid orange jumpsuit. I hated it. It clashed with his entire being… yet… it oddly befitted him. '_It's because it matches his uncontrollable malice_,' the though rushed to me. Shock ran through my being again.

"Hnn… why must you look away like that my little scorpling… it feels rather insulting… as if you actually blame me…" his voice seemed to seethe, yet, that seducing, toxic tone remained, that tone that I adored. His words hit too close to home. His knowledge for the first time scared me. I didn't feel comfortable around him, I didn't feel desired.

"Scorpling?" His voice was sincere now, trying to comfort me. My body moved on its own accordance, being accustomed to wanting to caress his cheek and tell him I was alright.

"Yes Orochi-san?" I whispered quietly. I didn't feel right. Something felt so off, so awkward.

"Why… Why is your frame so tiny, so minuscule?" Concern was clearly evident in his voice, but I felt as I it weren't real. I wanted to know why I kept thinking such thoughts, "why haven't you been eating… you surely cannot be that far within your experiment…"

I bit my lip and fell silent. I couldn't tell him it was because of him. No, that would be putting the blame on him… I couldn't do that. Yet… at the same time I felt that it truly was his fault. I felt like screaming at him and yelling, blaming him for all of this.

I smiled weakly, and spoke in a truthful manner, but I was positive that he knew otherwise, "I am calculating out where I must conduct each action, therefore, I must have a smaller frame, only able to survive off the bare minimum Orochi-san." My voice sounded so dead and lifeless.

"Excellent…" his voice seemed creepy yet alluring, I couldn't decide, "you know scorpling… I can't have you starving yourself on my behalf… I was so worried about your safety… I'm truly sorry for what happened…"

For some odd reason, I didn't believe him,

"My poor little scorpling; you must be so guilty, you must miss me… I will be out soon enough and we'll be together again, won't that be wonderful –Sori-kun? We can spend eternity together," suddenly he moved closed to the screen, "because you're mine right…?"

"H-Hai…" I breathed quietly, my voice shaky.

"You belong only to me… you're only mine…. Only me…" he continued to whisper seductively with a sly smile in his face. I remained silent, letting him continue, "we need each other… nothing good can happen with us parted like this can it…?"

I looked down, feeling rather guilty. His words made me think, and I didn't like it, '_Could I live without him?_' I didn't like this.

"Sasori…" he seemed mad at me, using my actual name, "why are you so… _silent_? You know… we need each other. Yet, are you thinking of leaving me, are you thinking that you can survive without me? You know you cannot; you need me. Without me, you cannot fulfill your dreams… you cannot be immortal… you cannot last an eternity."

I stood up and glared at him. How dare me. How dare he suggest such an action? How dare he know of my thoughts? "Shut up Orochimaru!" I yell. I'll show him I can live on my own.

He chuckled darkly, "Even if you do manage to be immortal, will it be art? Will it be beautiful? You can't be lonesome and beautiful at the same time… in no time... you'll slither back to me because you're mine…"

I turned my back to him, clenching my fists and walked towards to the exit, "Shut up."

* * *

Took me awhile to write this  
I had trouble with Orochimaru's character so I read a lot of Orochimaru fan fictions (rosaso and OroKabu XD and then one poem about him and then that made me able to write again hehehehe)  
So yeah HERE IT IS!  
My friend actually helped me (RL) because I needed her suggestion on a few things and so she said that I should have Orochimaru say something to Sasori that Sasori didn't like XD Then I got stuck again on what Orochimaru should say... so I asked my Idol-sama and she helped me again XDD SO HERE IT ISH yay XD


	3. Recovery

Warnings: Orosaso, Deisaso (or SasoDei, it's currently undecided), short, fluff, angst, suicidal thoughts, a bit of OoCness

* * *

I slammed the door to our house, no _my_ house. Every picture I saw I shattered, I punched. '_How could he do that? How could he be so damn ignorant and self-absorbed_?!' I screamed in my mind, ripping his picture. I was beyond anger, I was beyond hurt. I finally realized his flaws; I finally realized his greed and his possessiveness. I hated it. '_How could I have come to like him?! How did I get involved in such a mess?_' I held our first picture together in my hands but I could bring myself to ruin it. I was surrounded by a mess.

Tears escaped my eyes again and I fell down. I still held the picture in my hands and I saw tears falling on the glass that protected it. '_Why… why… why…?_' I asked myself in my mind, the tears continuing to fall. I just didn't understand…

I sat there for hours until I knew I had to sleep. I stood up weakly, still holding the picture. I set it down on the nightstand and collapsed in bed. '_Why did he… Why did I…_' I asked myself, shaking my head. I knew I wouldn't get answers; or the ones I wanted at least. Deep down, I knew I missed him. The words he spoke to me ran through my head, '_You can't be lonesome and beautiful at the same time… in no time... you'll slither back to me because you're mine…_'

'_Is it possible…? Could I survive without him…? Could I... be beautiful without him…?_' The tears slid down my face again. I knew that. I knew I couldn't mentally be stable without him. I could try... but I would fail…

But; I knew, I knew I could make myself immortal, and I would.

I turned over and my face was embedded in a pillow. _'O-Orochi…_' I thought, breathing in his scent. I missed him.

--

I sat around for a month while I plotted my puppetization. I didn't leave the house; I had enough food to last me. I had visitors who were concerned for my health, but I reassured them I was alright. They didn't know my devastating plans to rid myself of my human flesh and to replace it with wood. I drew on my body and I drew on paper. I slowly began to feed myself again once my plans were complete.

It was then when I decided I would see him again.

The meeting was short and brief, but we came to an understanding. We began to appreciate one another again, though now I could see his flaws.

I was sure he could see whatever flaws I had, and that he always could. I also… didn't seem to accept Orochimaru's flaws. No, that wasn't the word… I didn't like Orochimaru's flaws. His flaws seemed to make him into an entirely different person, it made him… peculiar, and it made him not normal. I didn't like it.

I didn't feel the same around Orochimaru; everyday we seemed to drift further and further apart. I wasn't too sure who was changing, him, me, or both of us. Konan seemed to pick up on this and she took an hour or so out of her busy schedule to visit me. She continued to comfort me. I didn't know what was wrong anymore. She also kept suggesting I enter this counseling session, but every time I turned it down. I didn't think I needed such a drastic action.

Konan observed my slow change; my newfound addiction to my art. I always made puppets; and in secret I created my own limbs to the exact proportions I jotted down months ago. Eventually, my own puppet was completed, yet at the same time; Konan barged into my house yet again.

"Sasori!"

I turned around and quickly covered my other body, "What is it Konan?" I responded with my emotionless voice.

"What has Orochimaru been saying to you? You've changed since the incident! You never spend time with your friends; you just visit Orochimaru and stay in your house the entirety of the day working on your puppets. What's wrong?!"

"Nothing Konan, I'm just working on a project of mine."

"Yeah right Sasori. I see it I your eyes. You've changed. Your voice is emotionless; your eyes never shine like they once did. You NEED to see that group Sasori. They can help you."

"I don't need help Konan. I'm perfectly fine," I responded defensively, "there's nothing wrong with me dammit!"

She then raised her hand and I felt a stinging sensation on my cheek, "SNAP OUT OF IT!" she screamed, glaring at me, "you need it Sasori. You're leaving all of us behind. You don't even seem to enjoy visiting Orochimaru anymore! You're treating him like a routine; everything is lifeless to you now. Nothing seems to have a meaning. Go… please…" she was now pleading with me, her eyes watering up, "for us…"

I sighed. "Fine, when is the next meeting?"

"It's on Thursday"

I froze. That was my one-year anniversary – that of Orochimaru's sentence.

"Sasori?" Konan spoke. Her voice seemed to echo in my head. I felt the tears coming and I knew I couldn't stop them. My legs gave out on me and I brought my hands to my eyes. "W-Why… It..it's… it's been a year… Why…"

I felt Konan embrace my frame and rub my back soothingly, "It's okay Sasori…. It's okay…" she whispered in my ear, "it's okay."

--

I entered the building with my head facing down. I talked to the clerk and made my way to an elevator.

"Watch it hmm!" A male voice spoke after I bumped into somebody. I looked up to see a blond-haired person who was slightly taller than me. His appearance was rather peculiar, their hair long.

"I'm sorry…" I spoke quietly, though I could not take my eyes off of him.

His hair was split into thirds, one in front of his right eye, another tied into a high ponytail on top of his head and the remaining bit was let down on his back. His skin was tanned and it lay over top of a muscular yet feminine frame. One of his eyes was visible and it shone a brilliant shade of blue, his lips were thin yet slightly plump and he had high cheek bones. His body was slim and curved. At a first glance, one could easily mistake him as a female, though he had a pronounced Adam's apple. He was almost in every way opposite of Orochimaru. I had no clue why I thought this, but I noticed it. Instead of dark, black hair, this stranger had vibrant blond hair; his skin was tanned beautifully unlike Orochimaru's, whose was a pale and creamy tone. And while Orochimaru appeared masculine yet remained beautiful and strong; this blond was feminine, elegant, and somewhat fragile-looking. I didn't know how to react. I didn't even know why I was even observing this total stranger.

The 'ding' of the elevator shook me out of my thoughts. The cerulean-coloured eye seemed to be glancing down at me, observing me. Just like I. We both turned and walked into the elevator and he asked politely.

"What floor un?"

* * *

Here's part Three hahaha XD It's actually a bit farther than I expected but I promised my friend that I would have Deidara in this part haha :P  
And Yes, I know it jumps all over the place I'm having this fanfiction short so that's why I'm having weird jumps about in time haha OH YEAH just to let you know, the last part took place the day AFTER the first part :P (if theres any confusion lol)

Orochimaru, Konan, Sasori and the unmentioned male that says 'un' (comon you know who i'm talkin about ;P) belong to masashi Kishimoto!  
Plot belongs to moi, (aka vatelle/petite-neko)


	4. Introductions

Warnings: Orosaso, Deisaso, short, fluff, angst, suicidal thoughts, a bit of OoCness

Disclaimer: Deidara, Tobi, Zetsu, Orochimaru, Sasori, and Shizune belong to Masashi Kishimoto  
Plot (c) me aka petite-neko/vatelle

* * *

'In order to form new bonds, the old ones must be broken.'  
My science teacher.

Chapter Four - Introductions

--

I looked up from the floor to look at him, "Floor seven" I spoke monotonously.

I saw a smile flash across his slim lips, "That's the same as me, un. Funny huh?" his voice seemed to straight, slightly sounding as if he forced something out of it. His eye seemed to speak to me, it looked at me sadly. I felt like comforting him, I felt like telling him everything would be okay. '_Wait! What am I thinking?! I forgot about Him, I totally dismissed Orochi from my mind!_' I didn't respond to the blond and his smile faded. It didn't bother me though, I knew it was fake.

"So, what's your name un? Mine's Deidara." As he spoke, I knew what was wrong with his voice earlier. He forced happiness. His voice was casual now, though his face showed no outward emotion.

"Sasori." I spoke bluntly. Over the last year, I noted my change. I was now more stoic and neutral than before. I hated, no, _loathed_ human contact. It was all Orochimaru's fault.

I stopped. I didn't feel anything. Why didn't I? Konan's words echoed through my head, '_You don't even seem to enjoy visiting Orochimaru anymore! __You're treating him like a routine; everything is lifeless to you now._'

_Was it true? Was I falling out of love with him?_ My emotions must have shown on my face, as Deidara asked, "Sasori un? Are you alright?"

I blinked, "Nothing's wrong. I just remembered I forgot to feed my cat." My voice remained toneless.

Deidara appeared worried, yet he had a hidden emotion in his eye that I could not decipher. Another 'ding' sounded and we both exited the elevator. "Where are you going hmm?" He asked me with a fake smile on his face.

"A meeting" I said lifelessly.

"Oh. Same here." He spoke dejectedly.

We both continued to walk in silence and he seemed to understand my anti-social behaviours. It seemed to bother me that this male was so quiet. He didn't seem like the type to be quiet. I shook my head, wondering why I kept thinking about this total stranger.

"I guess I'll see you later Sasori, this is my stop un." The blond said, and I was about to nod in response but I saw the number on the door, and I smirked.

"Looks like you won't be yet Deidara," I said in an amused tone, turning.

The blood looked confused for a second before his face lit up, "You're smiling Sasori!" He said cheerfully.

This time I could tell that his joy was real and I wished it could be preserved forever, sealed within an eternal art piece. His words, though, and thoughts seemed to hit me as I blinked and frowned, "Don't let it get to you brat." I said in an annoyed tone. '_Why was I smiling around a total stranger? Why… why did I see such an amiable beauty in his face?_'

"You coming?"

His voice broke me out of my thoughts and I grunted, walking into the room.

There was a circle of chairs and I observed many people, both male and female within this circle. One stood out particularly to me.

He (I wasn't too certain on the gender, for an orange swirled mask blocked their face, but there wasn't any evidence supporting that it was of feminine nature) had dark, black, spiky hair. He seemed to be rather tall in height (though he was sitting) and he wore this odd shirt. On the left side he had these black things (I could never find a way to describe them otherwise) linked together and black gloves. Overall, I thought the guy was rather suspicious and I did not like him.

I then heard a female voice, "And here is the other newcomer, Sasori." I blinked and look at the girl with brown hair and she had a pin with the name 'Shizune' on it.

I sighed and sat down, the blond having to sit next to me.

"Now let's begin…" Shizune spoke, "Let's introduce ourselves."

I listened as each person spoke and their problems were revealed though, I only really paid attention to Deidara and the masked-person.

As his turn came up, he stood up and spoke in a rather unexpected way, "Tobi's name is Tobi, and Tobi is a good boy! Tobi is twenty-five years old. Tobi has a boyfriend named Zetsu and he loves Zetsu a lot. But…" He then looked down a bit sadly or shyly, I couldn't tell which, "Zetsu has two personalities and one of them is evil and bad. He scares Tobi a lot…" The now internally-dubbed 'masked-idiot' sat down.

Though, the male's voice and his actions really did surprise me. So many things seemed to contradict within this 'boy' (though I highly doubted he was). He was just too mysterious.

When it was Deidara's turn, his voice changed drastically.

"My name is Deidara, un. I am twenty-two years old. I have a partner who is a bit umm… bi-polar or something and he sometimes can be… rather…" I noticed Deidara's actions and I could feel his sorrow. This blond, he made me feel so... _different_. It was if I were bound to him by some invisible string. And, I didn't know why. "Mean to me..." He then sat down. I also noticed that Tobi was paying close attention to Deidara and was carefully observing him. This made me dislike the masked-idiot further, and I really didn't understand why. I just met Deidara for Kami's sake!

I then noticed several eyes on me, jolting me back to reality.

It was my turn.

* * *

IM BACK! Hehehe! Part 5 is going to be typed up now D Tell me if I have any typos and YES TOBI IS IN THE SESSION!! ehehehehe He's there for a reason but I'm not telling you.  
Oh! Also, to make this story a bit better, I'm open to pairings for this fanfictions that have problems BUT NO AKATSUKI PLEASE lol D Anything else though I'm open to Itasasu if u want but it would be Sasuke and have a side story to it D  
and no Oc x Naruto chars either, im open to Oc x Oc and! if you have any ideas for their problems just tell me


	5. Feeling

Warnings: Orosaso, Deisaso, short, fluff, angst, suicidal thoughts, a bit of OoCness

Disclaimer:  
Deidara, Sasori, Tobi, Shizune, Orochimaru belogn to Masashi Kishimoto  
Plot/dead girl belogn to me Aka petite-neko/vatelle

* * *

'In order to form new bonds, the old ones must be broken.'  
My science teacher.

Chapter Five - Feeling

--

I gulped, but sat up.

"My name is Sasori and I am twenty-eight years old. My partner was convicted for a crime and is currently in jail. Because of the… _punishment_ (I had struggled to say that word) I feel as if we are drifting apart. That is why I am here," I said bluntly. I was very careful not to mention his name, or that I was in a relationship with a man.

"Very good everybody! Now let's start with deciding why you fear things, etc. and how to solve them. How about you first Sasori?" Shizune said optimistically.

I looked up, a bit shocked.

"Don't worry dear, we wont pry if you don't want to."

I just shrugged.

"So Sasori? What crime was your beloved convicted of and do you think they are guilty?"

I sighed, "…" I didn't know how to respond properly, "Shizune-san? May I call them a nickname? I… I don't want to say their same." I really didn't. I knew that even though Orochimaru and I were falling apart, (I have now accepted that fact) I just couldn't bear to state his name in front of everybody. I still had affection for him.

"Of course dear, whatever makes you comfortable, what would you like to call them?"

I tiled my head at this, "Hebi…"

She just nodded.

I took a breath and started, "Well, Hebi was convicted for murder," I heard a small gasp from a few people, though Deidara did not, and that had pleased me a little. I really didn't know why, "And they were put in jail for it. But… I don't think that Hebi is guilty, because I was there… Hebi was just protecting me…" I felt a wave of sorrow and guilt, '_If only I could have protected myself…_' I thought.

"By there, you mean you witnessed the murder Sasori?" Shizune asked as she jotted things down.

I just nodded. I felt Deidara gazing intently at me. Nothing felt right.

"Okay. That's enough for today. Who wants to go next?"

* * *

We had only gone through three more people, none of which were Deidara or Tobi, before the session was over. I glanced at my watch as I left the room but I was stopped by a voice.

"Hey Sasori un! Wait up!"

I turned around to see the blond running towards me, but I remained silent.

"Come here, let's go down using the stairs," He said which perked my interest, confusing me. Wouldn't the normal person use the elevator? It's only common sense.

"Why don't we use the elevator? It's quicker." I said, glaring slightly at the blond. I really didn't understand his logic, must be from his light hair.

A grin appeared on his face, "That's what you think, but I know that three meeting end at this time, many people get off and start work. The stairs are more efficient un." He seemed to be proud of his knowledge. This blond just earned a point or two.

"Good. Thank you since I hate waiting." I said bluntly. This male was odd, but it didn't bother me for some reason. I would be normally pushing a brat like him out of the way, and going where I wanted to. He seemed to trigger a spark of conversation within me, though it was probably because I didn't talk to people anymore. "So how long have you been in that group?" I asked him.

"Oh… about six months un. So, what made you come here?" He said, an unusual grin on his face. It made me want to smile at him. His aura that he radiated made me feel at ease. I just didn't know how to react, though my body did it for me.

I laughed. It felt so foreign to me "Looks like you hit the spot brat." I said, grinning back at Deidara, though it quickly faded, "A friend of mine's been pestering me for months and she then pleaded, so, I decided to come." For the first time in a year I am having a decent conversation with a person. It's making me feel again, and you could go as far to say there's a spark of happiness.

Suddenly my heart dropped and I ceased movement. '_It's the anniversary and I'm _**happy?!**_ I should be sitting alone, mourning but I'm _**happy?!**'

"Sasori un?" I heard the blond brat say. It was all his fault! If only that brat didn't show up!

"Shut up brat!" I snapped, glaring hatefully at him. There was fear in his eyes but I didn't care. I wanted to get away from him. I _needed_ to. He was like a disease -a disease of happiness. I stormed down the stairs and out to my car. I slammed the door, and rain began to pour.

I smashed my head against the steering wheel, a loud 'honk' echoed from my car. I didn't care anymore and I let the tears escape my eyes.

* * *

I know, I'm such a procrastinator XD

AND IM SORRY FOR THE ANGST! SERIOUSLY  
but it HAD to be there x.x or else it wouldn't seem realistic

AND IM STILL OPEN FOR IDEAS! like pairings :P

once i finish typing up a few thjings I'll work in this again I PROMISE...  
hopefully its updated soon XD


	6. Closer

Disclaimer:  
Orochimaru, Konan and Sasori belong to Masashi Kishimoto  
PLto and other msc. Characters belong to me aka vatelle/petite-neko

Warnings: Orosaso, Deisaso, short, fluff, angst, suicidal thoughts, a bit of OoCness, GORE

* * *

'In order to form new bonds, the old ones must be broken.'  
My science teacher.

Chapter Six - Closer

--

I hated this feeling. I felt so guilty. I didn't understand anymore. It's been a year and I still had this overwhelming guilt. I knew Orochimaru wasn't guilty. He couldn't be. But… No! I can't think like that.

I shook myself straight. I knew I needed to see him. But first I had to calm down. Visiting hours ended in five hours. I had a decision to make: go now or go home to calm down fully.

I didn't want him to see me like this.

I lifted my head from the steering wheel and wiped the tears from my eyes.

I felt horrible, completely and utterly horrible. How could I act completely normal, no scratch that. How could I let my mood lighten?! My heart ached terribly.

I drove all the way to my house, trying to keep my head steady. I needed to distract myself. Maybe I would create a new puppet or… Yes. That's what I'll do.

I walked over to my house and unlocked the door, my keys jingling in my hands. I knew what I would do, but I hope I'd have enough time. Five hours? I'd just call a taxi. He'd be proud of me.

'_How much should I do? My hand? My forearm? Yes. The forearm._' I thought to myself before I walked down into my basement. I had moved everything down here since Konan almost discovered my little secret. I smiled as I lifted the sheet that covered my wooden body. Oh… how lovely it was. I caressed the cheek of the face, smiling.

I disconnected the joint with a 'pop'. I laid myself down on the adjoining table, putting a band around my arm before sticking sterile needles into my flesh, numbing it totally and completely.

Then I began. I brought a machine to my arm, completely severing it from my body. The blood did not spray; it was contained within a plastic box. I watched it splatter on the tempered glass, hearing the metal cutting through flesh, muscle, and bone. My nerves had a clean break, enabling the prosthetic limb to be connected to my living body. I laughed insanely. My immortality was closing in.

My now disembodied limb lay limp in the box and I moved my shortened arm. A machine held the wooden replacement and I pulled out the replicas for my nerves and began to connect them to my body, carefully and gently. I didn't know how long it's been, nor did I care. I was engrossed within my work

Once the nerves and the rest of the internal objects were connected, I began to pull a material that was similar to rubber but not exactly. It resembled real skin and I smoothed it to blend in, appearing almost completely normal, only a faint mark that appeared to be a scar. I smiled, testing out the new movements. They were small and weak, as I expected, but, in due time I knew I could get accustomed to it. It was lovely. I stood up and looked at my mortal hand with disgust. I wondered how I would dispose of the revolting object. I shook my head before I headed up the stairs and locked the door behind it. It was 7:00 pm. Two more hours.

I moved and picked up the phone, dialling number fro a taxi and told them my residence and where I was planning to go. I waiting about fifteen minutes (much to my dismay and hatred).

My body was fighting , due to the blood loss from my little 'surgery', but I didn't have time to replace it. I needed to see Orochimaru. As I sat in the visitation room, my euphoria was evident in my eyes. Watched as he walked in, a smile upon his face.

"My little scorpling…" He whispered to me and I smiled at him, "You seem so happy… what the reasoning for this is…?" I loved how his s's were elongated. I loved to se the smirk on his face.

"It's been a year Orochi-san…" I said softly, and he nodded in agreement.

"Yes it has 'Sori. Only three more to go…." He said, licking his lips in excitement, "Once I'm out, we'll continue our beautiful art…" His voice was seductive. My bliss was corroding my mind and I knew it. But, I just wanted to share.

"I took the first step Orochi-san…" I said as I lifted my arm, "It'started." I could see his observation in my arm and I waited for his appraisal. I wanted to hear his comfort and suppose. I wanted him to e proud of me.

When I saw his scowl I blinked, '_What is wrong? Does he not like how it was done? How come he seems so upset…?_'

"How dare you start without me! How despicable! You're mine Sasori! You will never escape my grasp!! You will never complete yourself without me. You know that!" He yelled, and the guards began to crowd around him, holding his arms, "I'll never allow it!"

I blinked and felt a pang in my heart, '_Why is he so against this? He shouldn't be!! He's the one who ended up in jail! He has no right to disrespect what I've done!! It's my life! How dare he!_' I yelled before storming out of the police department and getting in another cab, going home.

'_I'll show him!_' I repeated in my mind.

* * *

Okay I said I would prbably procrastinate, but I lied xD  
ITS HERE!  
And, yes, the rating has gone up due to this chaapter. I really wasn'tplanning on making it mature aahahahaha

I was really pleased with the gore! I loved it. And then, I was just so happy when the OroSaso came about, I loved it!!

yes, Orochimaru became really possessive and had to be taken away. Did I make him a bit OoC? ..;;


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